blank...

one said that when you learn something, it's similar to filling up a HUGE bucket with water. in the beginning, you'll feel that the bucket fills up so fast... but after certain time, you'll feel as if the water just stays at the same level even though the water keeps pouring, and in fact still filling up the bucket.

confused? oh well.. it's something like that... start from knowing nothing to suddenly you know something, you'll feel as if you become so smart so fast... then when you know your shit already, what you do everyday in life become sort of meaningless... i mean, still have meaning there, but not as much as in the beginning...

anyway...
that's pretty much what i feel today... am i really learning something here? f/ my school? f/ my work? why somehow i feel so dumb right now? as if my head is hollow and empty inside... is it because i need more sleep? or the food i've eaten so far? or what?

looking at everybody at my work today, they really look like they know what the heck they're doing.. esp. those bosses... they talk, always on the phone, meeting, replying emails... shit! meanwhile i'm still doing the sameeee freaking thing... do these people really work? these designers around me... how on earth do they get all those great concepts and inspirations???

darn it! my brain is so blank right now... then with this condition i ain't supposed to worry a thing about finding a job 'n shit?

God, i really hope that everything i do right now worth something later in my life 'n career...