never eat alone
think & grow rich
why do you cheat?
once in a blue moon, someone i've known very close called international and was crying on the phone. she told me that her family just shattered into pieces after her dad was caught cheating on her mom... to be exact, actually my friend just found out about it. her mom knew about what he did all along since it wasn't the 1st time, but had never said a word, until she couldn't stand it anymore. there i was w/ the phone on my ear, helplessly only able to be her good listener while she was telling me the story, and how pissed she was. i was so stunned 'cuz all this time, her family looked as if they were in a perfect harmony. everything looked so good and blissful..... i guess the saying "never judge only from the cover" applies here...
many of us might already experience being cheated on or cheating with someone. adultery has been happening for God knows how long... not only by men, but also women. some get caught, some get away. pigs, bitches, dogs, whore, all those flowery words have been used to call the cheating person. understandably, it does hurt so bad when the truth, that your significant other is cheating on you, comes out.
many said that the percentage of men to cheat is higher than women. hey, i'm not a scientist or a researcher, however, it might be true due to the nature guys were created(*) he he he... we all make mistakes. many times we bury ourselves in our shit hole. i just think that whoever commits the adultery, they might have the same 1 or 2 or more basic reasons; either they simply have some problems within themselves (that they do it just for the sake of thrills, having fun or what not) or problems created by their partner or by both of 'em (without they both realizing it)........... reading this post this far, someone might wanna say to me 'ooh! that's what you think huh? but guys are bla bla bla bla... they bla bla bla... you're a girl, why don't you stand behind your own kind!'........... hey! as much as i hate being cheated on, i'm trying to be as objective as i can here, k? i don't think there's any justification for people who are cheating. they're still guilty. however, those who are left behind need to move on and learn from it, no matter how freaking painful it is. as a saying goes, "it takes two to tango". before pointing finger to the other person, maybe it's a good idea for us to first look within ourselves since we might be contributing as much to the whole scenario. i KNOW that it's not easy at all to look at ourselves and admit 'yes, i was such a controlling dude... or yes, i was just a sloppy person who never took care of myself.. or yes, i was such an obsessive/possessive bitch.. or whatever', but don't you think if we know who we really are, what we do wrong to others, and are willing to fix it, we can be a better person? and hopefully the next partner won't look the other way?...................... well, again, there's no definite guarantee since there're way too many brain damaged people out there who can be tempted way too easily or even tempting themselves to stray. but at least, we do this for ourselves to be a someone better and won't do the same mistakes, esp. when the right person comes along
i'm a woman, however, i don't wanna say that ALL
men are pigs or dogs(**) 'cuz i KNOW how some girls can be as bad as guys or even worse. there are still good men out there... even though the % is very very small hehehe (and this goes for men, too)...
what i wonder lotta times is that, esp. those who are already married 'n have kids, don't you ever think that when you cheat, you scar your kids (for life) as much as your spouse, esp. if your kids already have the understanding of what's going on? without you realize it, you screw up their trust or hope of a good person out there. so please don't come around later in the future to start preaching and act as if you have no part of it.... those who are with the cheater, what make you think that s/he isn't going to do the same to you? or maybe you are doing it just for heck of it, huh?..... hmmm, despite of the media influence, don't you think this is 1 of many reasons why all the problems (divorces, early pregnancies, drugs, etc.) occur nowadays? there're more and more broken homes these days and many people already lose their faith.
it IS really shitty when it does happen. your heart hurts so much 'n your world tumbles down.
what are you gonna do if your partner cheats on you? which 1 is more hurtful... your partner cheats with the opposite sex or the same gender? :) i guess it'll create another discussion eh?? but to end this, i just wanna say that at some 'special settings', dating scene ain't that easy at all, eh?? 'cuz we have to compete with both genders :D.... ohh, don't we all who live or used to live in SF know about this... ha ha ha...
a bit more info:
+) more in general an point of view, article from AskMen.com gives general reasons why some people cheat.
++) and little survey about men quoted from Glamour magazine
Why do they do it?
Glamour asked more than 100 men under 40 if they'd ever been tempted to stray, and a whopping 91% said yes; 51% of those guys went on to cheat. Why'd they do it?
Why did the other 49% stay faithful?
many of us might already experience being cheated on or cheating with someone. adultery has been happening for God knows how long... not only by men, but also women. some get caught, some get away. pigs, bitches, dogs, whore, all those flowery words have been used to call the cheating person. understandably, it does hurt so bad when the truth, that your significant other is cheating on you, comes out.many said that the percentage of men to cheat is higher than women. hey, i'm not a scientist or a researcher, however, it might be true due to the nature guys were created(*) he he he... we all make mistakes. many times we bury ourselves in our shit hole. i just think that whoever commits the adultery, they might have the same 1 or 2 or more basic reasons; either they simply have some problems within themselves (that they do it just for the sake of thrills, having fun or what not) or problems created by their partner or by both of 'em (without they both realizing it)........... reading this post this far, someone might wanna say to me 'ooh! that's what you think huh? but guys are bla bla bla bla... they bla bla bla... you're a girl, why don't you stand behind your own kind!'........... hey! as much as i hate being cheated on, i'm trying to be as objective as i can here, k? i don't think there's any justification for people who are cheating. they're still guilty. however, those who are left behind need to move on and learn from it, no matter how freaking painful it is. as a saying goes, "it takes two to tango". before pointing finger to the other person, maybe it's a good idea for us to first look within ourselves since we might be contributing as much to the whole scenario. i KNOW that it's not easy at all to look at ourselves and admit 'yes, i was such a controlling dude... or yes, i was just a sloppy person who never took care of myself.. or yes, i was such an obsessive/possessive bitch.. or whatever', but don't you think if we know who we really are, what we do wrong to others, and are willing to fix it, we can be a better person? and hopefully the next partner won't look the other way?...................... well, again, there's no definite guarantee since there're way too many brain damaged people out there who can be tempted way too easily or even tempting themselves to stray. but at least, we do this for ourselves to be a someone better and won't do the same mistakes, esp. when the right person comes along
"scienta est potentia" or "knowledge is power"
~Francis Bacon
i'm a woman, however, i don't wanna say that ALL
men are pigs or dogs(**) 'cuz i KNOW how some girls can be as bad as guys or even worse. there are still good men out there... even though the % is very very small hehehe (and this goes for men, too)... what i wonder lotta times is that, esp. those who are already married 'n have kids, don't you ever think that when you cheat, you scar your kids (for life) as much as your spouse, esp. if your kids already have the understanding of what's going on? without you realize it, you screw up their trust or hope of a good person out there. so please don't come around later in the future to start preaching and act as if you have no part of it.... those who are with the cheater, what make you think that s/he isn't going to do the same to you? or maybe you are doing it just for heck of it, huh?..... hmmm, despite of the media influence, don't you think this is 1 of many reasons why all the problems (divorces, early pregnancies, drugs, etc.) occur nowadays? there're more and more broken homes these days and many people already lose their faith.
it IS really shitty when it does happen. your heart hurts so much 'n your world tumbles down.
what are you gonna do if your partner cheats on you? which 1 is more hurtful... your partner cheats with the opposite sex or the same gender? :) i guess it'll create another discussion eh?? but to end this, i just wanna say that at some 'special settings', dating scene ain't that easy at all, eh?? 'cuz we have to compete with both genders :D.... ohh, don't we all who live or used to live in SF know about this... ha ha ha...
(*) "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
~Robin Williams
(**) i haven't found pix about women, so for now leave it as it is :D
a bit more info:
+) more in general an point of view, article from AskMen.com gives general reasons why some people cheat.
++) and little survey about men quoted from Glamour magazine
Why do they do it?
Glamour asked more than 100 men under 40 if they'd ever been tempted to stray, and a whopping 91% said yes; 51% of those guys went on to cheat. Why'd they do it?
- 27% said the other person was irresistibly attractive.
- 17% said "I was flattered she found me attractive."
- 15% were unhappy or felt unappreciated in their relationship.
- 13% did it because they knew they could get away with it.
- 28% gave their own reason, ranging from "She had cheated on me, so it seemed fair," to "I was drunk at the time," and "I was about to end my relationship, so it wasn't really cheating, I figured." One even put it this way: "It's the animal in me—I can't and don't want to control myself!"
Why did the other 49% stay faithful?
- 33% said "I truly love my partner and made a commitment."
- 18% said they couldn't live with the guilt
- 14% felt that the flirting itself was exciting enough.
- 12% were afraid of getting caught.
- 23% gave other reasons: "Sex is sex. If you have a good sexual partner, you don't need it somewhere." said one. Another said, "It's not worth the hurt it would cause. How good could the sex be?"